Knights of Columbus #8

Issue 8: “Sheep’s Clothing, part 1: Zombies!”

PAGE ONE

“Previously” page.

PAGE TWO

1/ Expansive daytime establishing shot of a vast green grassland in Switzerland, punctuated in places by brown patches of fields, waiting for the harvest. Juxtaposed throughout the landscape is an enormous metal and concrete tube, half-embedded under the surface as it winds its way across the Swiss countryside. Clearly, the tube is part of a MUCH bigger circular expanse than what we can see in this one image, and in several places there are tiny encampments of scientific research stations scattered in little tents, illustrating just how vast this tube actually is. This is CERN’s much-heralded LARGE HADRON COLLIDER, the world’s biggest particle accelerator – 17 miles in circumference and crossing the border between Switzerland and France in 4 separate places.

CAPTION: Near Geneva, Switzerland.

CAPTION: The LARGE HADRON COLLIDER, commissioned by the European Organization for Nuclear Research.

2/ Cut to inside the tunnel, as an exhausted-looking scientist gives a guided tour to an American reporter wearing a PRESS badge, gesturing around the tubular walls with pride.

SCIENTIST: You’ll have to excuse our mess. We’re currently in the middle of doing a small OVERHAUL to the LHC’s systems.
SCIENTIST: You see, PARTICLE PHYSICS experiments have a way of exhibiting what you would call DIMINISHING RETURNS, as the technology involved in the process is pushed to its upward LIMITS. For every year that passes here at the COLLIDER, we get disagreeably LESS information out of it than we were able to attain the year BEFORE. Fortunately, we are able to combat those limitations by periodically enhancing the experiment’s energy and luminosity, and to restore it to the level of success we’re hoping to achieve.
SCIENTIST: Hence our - je ne sais pas? – UNDESIRABLE appearance at the moment.

REPORTER: Nonsense, my friend.
REPORTER: I’m honored just to have the chance to take a look. And I flew quite a ways to do just that. Thank you for having me.

SCIENTIST: Noblesse oblige. We hope you return to America with only the HIGHEST opinion of our work here at CERN.

3/ Close on the Reporter’s notebook, tucked under his arm as they walk through the endless tunnel. The notebook is scribbled on furiously, with various doodles and a substantial amount of random notes, most written as though they were written in anger.

REPORTER: Oh, I’m sure what I’ll find will be to my SATISFACTION.

4/ Long-panel as they continue their tour, the scientist motioning around at the various extremities and machinery emerging from the edges of the Collider’s interior.

SCIENTIST: The Collider itself is built from a previously existing particle accelerator – an electron-positron collider called the LEP. Once we were given the approval in 1995, we began the long and arduous process of CONVERTING the LEP into a 27 KILOMETRE device, so big as to require TWO COUNTRIES to hold it, in all its glory. 3.8 Metre diameter, concrete-lined tunnels, going as deep as 175 metres underground.

SCIENTIST: So much LIQUID HELIUM is required to keep the MAGNETIC SUPERCONDUCTORS at operating temperature that we are effectively the largest CRYOGENIC FACILITY in the WORLD.

SCIENTIST: What we are hoping to achieve – our Raison D’etre, if you will – is to accumulate INDISPUTABLE evidence of the existence of a hypothetical SCALAR ELEMENTARY PARTICLE called the HIGGS-BOSON, which has remained ELUSIVE for FAR TOO LONG.

5/ Close on the Reporter, looking intrigued.

REPORTER: And what is the significance of this HIGGS-BOSON?

6/ The scientist explains.

SCIENTIST: The Higgs-Boson is the ONLY major particle of STANDARD PARTICLE PHYSICS that as yet remains unobserved. To discover it would explain how MASSLESS ELEMENTARY PARTICLES are still able to construct MASS in MATTER. Elementary particle masses and the difference BETWEEN them are ENORMOUSLY important aspects of microscopic matter, and thusly EQUALLY important aspects of the OBSERVABLE WORLD.

SCIENTIST: The existence of the Higgs-Boson is so important because its discovery would be a HUGE step forward in the search for a GRAND UNIFIED THEORY.

PAGE THREE

1/ Close, again, on the reporter.

REPORTER: And the Grand Unified Theory…that’s STRING THEORY, right?

SCIENTIST: (off panel) Yes and no, sir.

2/ Long panel depicting the planets of the solar system, with the sun gleaming in the BG.

NARR (SCIENTIST): Einstein’s theory of GENERAL RELATIVITY does a perfectly satisfactory job of explaining how things in this universe work on a MACROSOPIC scale – such as the celestial orbiting of PLANETS, or the deep inner-workings of GRAVITY.

3/ Long panel depicting swirling particles and atoms, reflecting the image of the solar system and playing its counterpoint, with the primary pictured particles filling the panel in the exact same way the planets did.

NARR (SCIENTIST): And QUANTUM MECHANICS does an EQUALLY satisfactory job of explaining the behavior of the universe on a MICROSCOPIC scale, though its conclusions may sometimes seem more SCIENCE FICTION than SCIENCE fact.

4/ On the Scientist, explaining with animated gestures.

SCIENTIST: But the two sets of algorithms become PROBLEMATIC when dealing with an object that is both INIFINITLEY DENSE and INFINITELY SMALL – such as a BLACK HOLE, or the BIG BANG.

SCIENTIST: If the objects or events display the characteristics of being both impossibly heavy and impossibly microscopic, the two equations collide – and you discover that the numbers stop making sense. Our equations can’t possibly agree or even appear COHERENT, when put together.

5/ The reporter watches as the scientist turns around, gesturing wide as he imagines the frontiers of theoretical physics.

SCIENTIST: Which is what brought us to STRING THEORY.

6/ Long panel displaying a field of quivering blue strings, fluctuating wildly as they vibrate on the super-microscopic level.

NARR (SCIENTIST): String Theory is a highly theoretical field of science, designed to RECONCILE the two sets of equations that explain the universe – hoping to create the GRAND UNIFIED THEORY.

NARR: What emerged from the resultant equations was a picture of a universe in which ALL things that exist are the product of ONE essential element, vibrating at different frequencies to create everything we see or feel or touch, building from the ground up like a cosmic symphony. Imagine the TAO, the everlasting simplicity that everything in reality is created by the mystical force that holds it all together, as imagined by the Eastern Philosophies so long ago – and then imagine modern physics PROVING it, even if the terminology is kilometres apart.
NARR: Alas, the equations suggest strings that are so SMALL, we could never dream of observing them directly…and String Theory remains UNTESTABLE – firmly ground in the HYPOTHETICAL until something emerges that could firmly PROVE or DISPROVE it with any degree of accuracy.

7/ Close on the Scientist, holding his index finger and thumb together to indicate the smallness of the particles they are dealing with.

SCIENTIST: And, at present, that mysterious bit of evidence we need - for better or for worse, in String Theory’s case – is the Higgs-Boson.

8/ The reporter looks at the scientist, taking it all in, fascinated.

REPORTER: So your LARGE HADRON COLLIDER, and the upgrades being performed as we SPEAK, could ultimately unlock the key to understanding EVERYTHING in the universe.

SCIENTIST: That is our hope.

PAGE FOUR

1/ Long panel as the reporter heads off to the left, exploring through an open door into a dark antechamber off the side of the long corridor. The scientist moves to stop him, but the reporter eludes him.

REPORTER: And what’s in HERE?

SCIENTIST: Excuse me, sir, but you can’t go in there.

REPORTER: Oh, it’ll be fine.

SCIENTIST: SIR!

2/ The scientist follows into the dark chamber, fumbling around in the pitch black as he searches for a light. He looks deeply concerned.

SCIENTIST: Sir, this area is off-limits to the general public. I’m afraid I’m going to have to ask you to step back out into the main hallway.

3/ The scientist continues looking for the reporter in the dark, unaware that he has walked right past the reporter, who stands in shadow watching the scientist fumble around. The reporter grins wickedly.

SCIENTIST: Sir?

4/ Quickly, the reporter lunges from his concealment and attacks the scientist, gripping the sides of his head and twisting ferociously, snapping the scientist’s neck. The scientist barely has time to register surprise on his face.

SOUND EFFECT: CRACKK!

5/ As the scientist slumps over in the reporter’s arms, dead in an instant, the reporter leans forward and whispers into his lifeless ear.

REPORTER: Sweet dreams, my brainy friend.

6/ The reporter stands erect, and for a bizarre moment it appears that his facial features are melting into a massless goo, contorting and shifting wildly. In fact, it’s simply a glamour – a magical disguise meant to whither away when its purpose has been served. All around the shifting form, sparkles of light fill the air, the atmosphere in the room electrified by the complicated magics at work.

7/ The shape finally takes form, revealing the reporter’s true identity: Malice, the mysterious dark sorcerer we have been following peripherally since early issues. He still wears the reporter’s outfit, the spell only modifying his physical appearance and not his clothing. He reaches his wrist up to his face, speaking into a concealed microphone in his sleeve.

MALICE: Malice, here.
MALICE: You copy?

PAGE FIVE

1/ Brother Michael, Malice’s GRAND MAGUS – whom we met previously in issue #2 – sits at the wheel of a large unmarked van, positioned in a mysterious monitoring location. His hand idly resting on the steering wheel, he presses his free hand to his ear, adding pressure to the set of thick and bulky headphones he wears to communicate with Malice.

MICHAEL: You killed him, didn’t you?

2/ Back at the LHC, Malice crouches over the body of the scientist, rifling through the dead man’s coat pockets. He takes objects out, briefly examines them, and tosses them to the side, all while speaking into his communicator.

MALICE: What fun is CUNNING and DECEPTION, Brother Michael, if you can’t throw in a little premeditated HOMICIDE?

3/ Malice removes the man’s white lab coat, waving it into the air to get the stench of death from out of its folds. He examines it appraisingly, the look of grim satisfaction still on his face.

MALICE: Besides, I needed the freedom to move AROUND in here, and I need this man’s nifty little ACCESS card to do it.

4/ Back to Brother Michael, leaning over the wheel and looking vaguely annoyed with Malice. He presses the speaker once more to his ear.

MICHAEL: You could have simply STOLEN it.

MALICE: (electronic voice from headphones) You needn’t be such a CONSTANT stick in the MUD, Brother Michael. I think you’ll find you’ll enjoy yourself if you just LIGHTEN UP once in a while.

5/ Over Malice’s shoulder as he examines the access card he has removed from the scientist’s coat, speaking into his wrist microphone.

MALICE: What about our pals, the KNIGHTS OF COLUMBUS?
MALICE: Any news, yet?

6/ Back to Michael, though at a different angle. We are outside the van, looking into his driver side window from a short distance behind, revealing the brightly glowing laptop computer that sits before him, propped up against the steering wheel.

MICHAEL: Still all quiet on the western FRONT, there.
MICHAEL: Some of the OTHER cities’ teams have been making HEADLINES – especially this PARALLAX, out of New York – but our friendly neighborhood KNIGHTS are continuing to have a quiet WEEK.

7/ Malice, having already put on the white lab coat, now concentrates on pinning on the access card with the scientist’s picture on it, speaking into his microphone as he does – albeit awkwardly, as both hands are required to successfully pin on the card.

MALICE: Well, BULLY FOR THEM, I suppose.

8/ Once again, Malice shifts his appearance, his face appearing to melt and reform, the air filling with the magical crackle and sparkle.

9/ The new glamour in place, Malice now looks exactly like the scientist he just killed. He smiles an evil smile as he prepares to make his way back into the main chamber of the LHC, making his final comments to Michael.

MALICE: But I’ve got a fun new GLAMOUR to play with, and plenty more PRESSING matters with which to OCCUPY my time.

MICHAEL: (electronic voice from wrist speaker) Anything else, Malice, sir?

MALICE: That’ll be ALL, Michael. I’ll be in TOUCH.
PAGE SIX

1/ This is a FULL PAGE SPLASH, featuring the issue’s TITLES, CREDITS, and INDICIA. We are high above the ground, crashing out a skyscraper window as the street looms threateningly below. The two combatants who have crashed so violently out this window are Beth – a look of steely determination on her face, with only her arms half-transformed into Werewolf form – and a hulking gray abomination, swinging his lumbering fists at her as he tumbles out the window behind her. Her back to the ground, she continues to battle the brainless monster, fists swinging and claws digging into his thick gray hide as she struggles for dear life hundreds of feet above the ground and closing. It is broad daylight, and the sun reflects off the cars passing below, illuminating how disastrously public this little altercation actually is.

NARR: Downtown Columbus.

NARR (BETH): Ha. Okay. Long story short?

NARR: This SOLOMON GRUNDY-looking idiot worms his way out of the sewer system in the DISCOVERY DISTRICT and rampages his way toward DOWNTOWN, laying waste to some of the NICER houses this side of PARSONS in the process.

NARR: So Andrew calls in the HEAVY HITTER (which is ME, in case you’re just tuning in) and decides it’s best to fight fire with fire.
NARR: Cut to me, falling out of an UNCOMFORTABLY HIGH 37th floor window in RHODES TOWER, plummeting toward the streets full of unsuspecting PASSERS BY below.

NARR: When we were running through the building, I thought it best to stay in HUMAN FORM for as long as I could, but now I’m thinking a bit of a WOLF-OUT wouldn’t be such a BAD IDEA – if only I can BULK UP in time to NOT be splattered all over Broad Street when we hit bottom.

NARR: Here’s HOPING.

NARR: I love my job.

PAGE SEVEN

1/ Tall panel, from a fair distance (the riverfront, maybe?), as Beth and the Beast fall toward the street, a cascade of glass tumbling down from above them as they fall.

NARR: Yeah, see?

NARR: Told you it was pretty HIGH.

2/ From above, on Beth as she falls. Her arms transform fully, becoming her wolf-form arms, and the rest of her slowly begins to transform.

3/ Close on Beth’s face, still falling, as her eyes shift and become wolf eyes, the features on her face beginning to contort. Behind, we can see how much closer to the ground she already is, dangerously close to striking.

NARR: Still not used to doing this in PUBLIC.

NARR: Maybe never WILL be.

4/ Close on Beth’s leg, transforming to wolf-form. Behind, the ground races upward.

NARR: The hell with it.

5/ Long panel, as Beth lands on the pavement in the middle of Broad Street, fully transformed and landing gracefully in an attack pose. Cars swerve to miss her, the drivers terrified.

SOUND EFFECT: Sccreeech!

NARR: Rather be EMBARASSED than SPLATTERED.

6/ Long panel, as BethWolf turns to watch the Solomon Grundy monster strike the sidewalk with a sickening crunch, kicking up a cascade of shattered concrete as he does. He lands in an unceremonious heap, disappearing slightly into the crater he’s created.

SOUND EFFECT: CRUNCHHH!

PAGE EIGHT

1/ The monster climbs up from out of the rubble, thick, beefy hands clutching shattered rock and pulling the enormity of his weight up into full view, his cross-eyed stare and twisted overbite visible for the first time.

MONSTER: (twisted, monstrous balloon) Gray man wants to HURT the puppy woman!

NARR: He’s TENACIOUS. I’ll give him that.

2/ BethWolf pulls back, her ears pointing backward as she prepares to leap into battle, her teeth bared viciously.

BETH: (monster balloon) Grrrrr…

3/ Long panel as the two leap toward each other, intended to lock into combat. The Beast, however, simply grabs BethWolf’s front paws and squeezes, crunching her hands. She shouts in pain.

SOUND EFFECT: CRACK!
BETH: Yalp!

4/ Suddenly, an additional Werewolf leaps from out of nowhere and sinks its fierce teeth into the beast’s exposed underarm. The beast screams in pain, caught off-guard by this secondary attack from a new werewolf – its fur a sleek gray as a counterpoint to Beth’s feral brown.

SOUND EFFECT: CHOMP

MONSTER: Yarrrg!

NARR: Luckily, I’m not ALONE.

5/ The Gray Wolf shoves the beast to the ground and pounces, poised aggressively on top of the monster’s chest. It snarls at the beast, revealing itself to be Landon in wolf form.

LANDON: (monster balloon) Get away from my WIFE.

6/ Long panel as pedestrians and passers by run for cover, simultaneously terrified and fascinated by what they’re getting to see today. The fight rages on in the BG, as they run from it for dear life.

MAN 1: Oh my god! It’s the Knights of Columbus!

MAN 2: Look out!

PAGE NINE

1/ Long panel as LandonWolf and BethWolf descend on the monster, poised to strike. The beast pulls back his fist, preparing to take a swing at Landon.

BETH: Thanks for the SAVE, babe.

LANDON: No prob –

2/ The beast’s punch connects with Landon’s face, sending Landon flying off to the side.

BETH: (off panel) LANDON!

3/ Beth leaps at the beast from behind, sinking her teeth into the flesh of his shoulder.

BETH: Son of a bitch.

MONSTER: Arrrgghh!! Puppy woman HURT GRAY MAN!

4/ Beth pulls away, twisting her head to casually toss aside the chunk of flesh she’s torn.

5/ The Monster’s POV as the two werewolves descend on him, saliva dripping from their mouths as they snarl at him.

BETH: Don’t kill him. We just need to mess him up enough so that Andrew can give him to the guys in CHARGE.

LANDON: Got it.

6/ They pounce, and we see only their backsides sticking up into the air as they gore the Monster just enough to incapacitate him. Flecks of blood fly into the panel.

MONSTER (off panel): Stop it! Stop hurting GRAY MAN!

7/ Long panel, Low angle as Beth and Landon finally finish, standing up in human form as steam curls off their bodies. They stand in the middle of Broad Street in their underwear, still reeling from the transformation, blood stains on their hands. The battered body of the monster sticks up into the panel from below, and the people on the streets slowly approach, feeling safe now that they are in human form. A woman on the left side speaks up, as does a man on the right.

WOMAN 1: Are you BETH?
WOMAN 1: The WEREWOLF woman?

MAN 1: Can I have your AUTOGRAPH?

NARR: Not even quite FOUR MONTHS into this, and already I’m a celebrity.

NARR: We keep meaning to do a better job of playing it QUIET in the PUBLIC EYE…but then, I guess it’s one of those things we’ve just decided to deal with LATER.

NARR: You know, LATER…when you do the stuff you’re TOO BUSY to worry about RIGHT NOW, which is usually when it really MATTERS.

NARR: Funny how that works.

PAGE TEN

1/ Cut to Rhiannon, holding up a pair of jogging shorts appraisingly and supporting a cordless phone between her cheek and her shoulder, dressed only in a towel wrapped tightly around her midriff. She stands in her bedroom, on the top floor of the house she shares with roommates near campus, and early morning sunlight beams in through the windows. Her hair is still limp and wet, slicked back over her shoulders, as she speaks with Milo on the phone. In the BG, her computer sits on a desk, open to Internet Explorer with barely visible images of pornography on the screen.

RHI: Hey, It’s me.

MILO (electronic voice through phone): Oh, hey, what’s up?

RHI: What’s that website you’re always talking about? The porno thing?

2/ Milo stands in the front desk area of a dusty clothing store, counting money. The walls are lined with T-Shirts and underwear, and the glass case that Milo stands at to count is filled with leather bracelets and cheesy trucker hats. Next to him on the counter sits the cash register, hanging open as Milo counts the till, which is sprawled out on the glass case. He wears a blue T-Shirt with what appears to be the diamond Superman emblem, but where the “S” would normally be are the words “Also Sprach.” He wears matching brown leather wristbands, and from the left side of his mouth hangs a smoldering joint.

MILO: SEAN CODY.
MILO: Why, exactly?

3/ Rhiannon turns away from picking out athletic clothes in her room to examine the computer screen, clicking away with the mouse and looking disappointed.

RHI: ‘Cause I’ve gotta say I’m not impressed.
RHI: This is some of the lamest porn I think I’ve ever seen. You really WATCH this?

MILO: I mostly just look at the pictures. Why, pray tell, are you looking at GAY PORN at nine-thirty in the morning?

RHI: Nothin’ else to do at the moment. Why are YOU answering the PHONE CALLS from the creepy girl who looks at gay porn at nine-thirty in the morning? You’re doing kind of a lousy job of being a SLACKER; if you’re really as wide awake as you SOUND.

4/ Milo puts the money down and looks quizzically at the phone, the joint wobbling in the air as he turns his head.

MILO: Because I’m opening the store? You know my schedule.

RHI: The STORE? What store?

5/ Rhiannon slaps her head as she realizes she already knows the answer.

MILO: What store?
MILO: Rhiannon…the clothing store. On High Street. Where I’ve worked for two weeks, now. Or better yet…the store you just CALLED ME AT.

RHI: OH, okay. Never mind. I just hit redial from the last time I called you. I don’t do a lot of PHONE business, as it were. But yeah, you’re at that place…”Man in Style,” or whatever the hell it’s called.

MILO: THERE you go.

6/ Milo stands in front of a fuse box, flipping switches as overhead lights come on all around him in the store. He dangles the joint in his fingers as he flips the switches, exhaling a big puff of smoke into the air as he does.

MILO: And you expect me to believe that you don’t call DONOVAN on the phone?

RHI: Not a phone person, he. Are you SHOCKED? Because I wasn’t.

MILO: Touché, my friend.

RHI: Why do you sound like that?

MILO: Sound like what? I mean…I’m smoking a joint. You mean that?

7/ Long panel as Milo walks back out into the main floor of the small clothing store, observing the large round racks of clothes that clutter the too-small floor, doing a little dusting where he can.

RHI: You’re smoking a joint at work?

MILO: Hey, these guys pay me UNDER THE TABLE. There’s no way they can honestly tell me there’s gonna be RULES in a place that practices habitual tax evasion.

RHI: That’s insane TROLL logic, Milo. Not that I would mind JOINING you.

MILO: Probably gonna be slow here today, if’n you wanted to stop by. What are your plans for the morning?

PAGE ELEVEN

1/ Long panel as Rhiannon holds up a hanger displaying a simple gray t-shirt, deciding whether or not it’s what she wants to wear. She has switched ears with the phone.

RHI: I’m going running with Donovan. Should be by in a few minutes, here.

2/ Milo stands in the window display case of the store, tying the curtains that hang in the window at night off to the sides so as to showcase the peeling, ancient mannequins that stand idly by, draped in varying degrees of tasteless clothes.

MILO: Aww, look at you two, all TWITTERPATED.
MILO: Long walks on the BEACH and junk…

3/ Rhiannon lets the shirt dangle for a moment, having decided to wear it but finishing her conversation first.

RHI: Oh, gag me with a SPOON. I swear to god, the moment you have anything LIKE a possible romantic interest, I am gonna tell him every embarrassing story I know about you. And I’ll start with the MY LITTLE PONY story.

MILO: There IS no MY LITTLE PONY story. You made that UP.

4/ Milo approaches the store’s front door, pulling a jangling set of keys from his back pocket and looking distracted as he wraps up his conversation with Rhiannon.

RHI: So? Never let the truth get in the way of a good story, Milo.

MILO: Hey, I gotta go. It’s TEN.

RHI: Yeah? And?

MILO: Means I’ve gotta open the STORE now.

5/ Extreme Close up as Milo puts out the joint against the door-frame, a shower of tiny red sparks floating down to the ground.

6/ Rhiannon pulls the gray shirt down over her head as the phone sits on top of her computer, Milo’s voice chirping out of it. She reaches over to push the disconnect button.

RHI: Pssh. Last time I call YOU for no apparent reason whatsoever.

MILO: Bye, Rhiannon.
RHI: Bye, Milo.

SOUND EFFECT: CLICK

7/ Close as Milo’s hand turns the key in the lock, opening the store.

PAGE TWELVE

1/ Long panel. Milo is putting a stack of hats high up on a shelf behind the front counter, with his back to us, as a young blond man enters the store, also with his back to us.
MAN: It’s MILO, right?

2/ Milo stumbles a bit but doesn’t fall, abruptly turning his head to see who it was that startled him.
MILO: Uh. Hi.
MILO: Can I help you?

3/ The man who has entered is David, the jogger who slammed into Milo by accident two issues ago. He leans on the glass case and re-introduces himself, smiling warmly.

DAVID: Remember me?
DAVID: I’m David. I bumped into you a while back, while I was jogging.

DAVID: Or, rather, I suppose I should say that I crashed HEADLONG into you.

4/ Milo immediately warms to him, leaning on the counter as well. The two share friendly conversation, and Milo is trying his damndest not to blush as David flirts. Milo gestures downward, indicating himself on the last comment.

MILO: Oh, yeah, of course! Didn’t think I’d see YOU again anytime soon.

DAVID: Well, I felt bad that I just kind of RAN off that day. I should have been more polite. I wanted to come in and apologize to you, personally.
DAVID: So, you know…MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.

MILO: Well, you certainly didn’t have to track me DOWN – as flattering as that may be. I assure you, I was totally okay. Still am.
MILO: See? Fit as a fiddle.

5/ Close on David as he smiles wryly, teasing Milo slightly with a raised eyebrow.

DAVID: Thanks for letting me off the hook, but I didn’t TRACK YOU DOWN. I just walked by and saw you standing in here, looking bored.

DAVID: Though, I must admit, I didn’t come in just to apologize.
DAVID: I thought I would try to make up for a missed OPPORTUNITY.

6/ Over Milo’s shoulder, toward David, as they talk. Milo recoils a little, unsure of what David means, and David smiles reassuringly.

MILO: What are you SAYING?

DAVID: I believe I’m asking you if you want to DO SOMETHING later this week.

7/ Close on Milo, smiling with surprise.
MILO: Seriously?
PAGE THIRTEEN

1/ Cut to a Close Up of Rhiannon’s iPod. As her thumb glides over the wheel we see that the song she has selected is “Allegro Moderato” by Wolfgang Mozart, and the date readout in the upper left-hand corner says “05/22/12.”

2/ Rhiannon pulls her hair behind her into a pony-tail, taking care to avoid tangling it up in the cords to her ear buds.

3/ On Rhiannon’s feet, as she laces up a brand new pair of running shoes, with a corporate stamp reading “LOGOS,” pulling the strings tightly upward toward her body before preparing to tie them tight.

4/ Alternate angle on the shoes, as she ties the laces into a bow.

5/ On her midriff, as she self-consciously straightens the gray t-shirt.

6/ Over her shoulder, as she glances down at her watch, anxiously waiting for the right time to run outside and meet Donovan.

7/ Outside, on her porch, as she jogs in place. Her hair bounces slightly as she watches the street for signs of Donovan’s approach.

8/ Donovan comes running up, similarly decked out in jogging gear, and Rhiannon races down to the street to join him in his run.

PAGE FOURTEEN

1/ Long panel as Rhiannon and Donovan jog down the street, side-by-side, exchanging pleasantries as they go.

RHI: Hey.

DON: Hey.

RHI: What’s the game plan today?

DON: Nothing crazy.
DON: Couple of miles sound okay?

RHI: Sure.

2/ Rhiannon jogs, sweating slightly as she talks to Donovan, the ear buds from her iPod bouncing wildly by the strap on her arm.

RHI: You know, I realize it’s only TUESDAY…
RHI:…but if we keep going at THIS rate, we might make it through this WHOLE WEEK without a single crazy or disastrous case to solve.

3/ Donovan nods his agreement as he jogs alongside her, also sweating.

DON: Yeah, it HAS been kinda nice.
DON: Tell you what, though, even if I hate to ADMIT it: I’m getting kind of BORED without some ridiculous case to deal with.

4/ Close on Rhiannon, sweat dripping down her forehead. She smiles.

RHI: Hey, now – don’t jinx it.
RHI: It’s not OFTEN that we get little VACATIONS like this.

5/ Close on Donovan, smiling back at her.

DON: True enough. Just the same, I wouldn’t mind SOMETHING to do.

6/ Long panel as they run down the street, passing the rows of big Campus duplexes on the way. They pass two strangers, whose heads turn immediately to watch them go running by. The strangers, a man and a woman, recognize them.

MAN 2: Hey, is that who I think it is?

WOMAN 2: It couldn’t be THEM, could it? Just running around like that?

7/ Small panel, as Donovan and Rhiannon exchange glances, Rhi gesturing back over her shoulder toward the man and woman with her thumb.

RHI: You getting SICK of that, yet?

DON: Does the pope wear a funny hat?

PAGE FIFTEEN

1/ Cut to a Long Panel Establishing Shot, with a panoramic view of OSU Campus. Andrew is leaving Kennedy Commons, rubbing his stomach from the meal he just shoveled down his throat between classes, as he talks excitedly to Palmer on the phone.

CAPTION: South Campus.

ANDREW: No, Mr. Palmer.

2/ Andrew lets the door to the cafeteria swing shut behind him, standing on the sidewalk outside as students gather around an ashtray and light up. He glances in their direction and decides to edge a bit further away from them, so as not to be overheard. He holds a paper cup in his hand, with a bright green straw sticking out of it. It is labeled “Kennedy Commons,” and plastered with OSU insignia.

ANDREW: Yes, of COURSE I’ve seen the news reports, Palmer!
ANDREW: But they don’t change anything!

3/ Andrew makes his way off to the side, around a nearby wall, for better concealment.

ANDREW: No, I DON’T think we should reconsider our METHOD. I think we’ve been doing a damn fine JOB out here.
ANDREW: Well, yes, it’s TRUE that we’ve been getting an awful lot of PRESS, but we were the FIRST team to get noticed. What did you expect? People’s attention will drift soon enough, when one of the other groups does something CRAZY.

4/ Andrew swings his arms out in frustration, liquid flying from the top of his straw.

ANDREW: Because it’s PREDICTABLE, Palmer. Come on! It’s only a matter of –

ANDREW: Suit yourself, sir. Consider the program for REVIEW all you want. But you and I BOTH know you aren’t going to do ANYTHING about it. So why even - ?

5/ Andrew looks at his phone in disbelief as he’s hung up on by Palmer. He takes a drink from his cup and clicks the button to hang up his own cell.

ANDREW: Hang up on me!?
ANDREW: (small font, muttered) Insufferable son-of-a-bitch.

6/ Close on Andrew’s cup as he takes the last sip. Off-panel, something crashes, creating a sudden stir.

SOUND EFFECT: Sluuurrrp.

SOUND EFFECT: CRRRASHHH!

7/ Andrew turns on a dime, tossing his cup into the recycle bin positioned next to a black metal trashcan. His tie flutters in the air as he spins to see what’s happening.

SHOUTS (off panel): OH MY GOD!!!

ANDREW: The HELL?

PAGE SIXTEEN

1/ A crowd of students comes running out of Kennedy Commons in an uncontrollable mob, stumbling over each other and screaming in fear as they do. Some of them appear to have been attacked, with spots of blood running down their foreheads or on their clothes.
STUDENT 1: Ahhhh!!

STUDENT 2: Help us!!!

STUDENT 3: RUN!!! Run for your life!!!

STUDENT 4: Oh my god! Oh my god!

2/ Andrew turns his head to watch them as they run past and disappear off-panel, with Kennedy remaining in the BG behind him, its front steps covered in strewn food and debris from the rampage that just left the building.

ANDREW: Jesus Christ!
ANDREW: What’s going ON?

3/ The door to Kennedy bursts violently open as a group of figures begins to pour its way out of the building. The shuffling, blood stained, brainless creatures stumble forward toward us and toward Andrew, arms outstretched before them and eyes glazed over as in death, their human bodies rotting away before our eyes. They should look both scary and pretty ridiculous, because that’s how Zombies look. As the doors fly open, they strike the concrete walls and shatter outward in an explosion of glass, sticking unnoticed into the flesh of the horde of Zombies that pours from the building.

SOUND EFFECT: KK-CRASHH!

ZOMBIES (in many little tailless balloons): ugh argggh yarggg graaaaa muhhh hunnnhh

4/ Andrew remains stationary, watching in disbelief as the horde of Zombies moves around him, for the most part ignoring him. There’s no reason for this – he’s just lucky. They travel past him and he stares at them as they go, halfway between terrified and amused.

ANDREW: No.
ANDREW: Way.

5/ Angle switch, as Andrew swivels his head back toward us, in the direction of Kennedy Commons, as the Zombies move past him and away from us, spreading out into the surrounding Campus. There’s about twenty Zombies in sight now, shuffling off toward the back of the panel, some still so close to us we can only see their backs or outstretched hands, some far enough away that they’re becoming blips on the horizon of the shot.

ANDREW: You have GOT to be kidding me.

6/ Cut to a lamp stand, in Beth’s house. There’s a cell phone sitting on the lamp stand and the cell phone begins to vibrate and chirp loudly. The room is lit by natural light, pouring in through the windows.
SOUND EFFECT: Boo-DEE-boop Boo-DEE-boop

7/ Beth picks up the phone, brushing a lock of hair out of her eyes as she answers.

BETH: Hello?

ANDREW (electronic phone balloon): Uh, Beth?

8/ Cut back to Extreme Close Up of Andrew on the phone, an incredulous and grim look on his face as he massages his forehead with his free hand, his eyes squinted tight in embarrassment at even having to relay this news.

ANDREW: We’ve got Zombies.

PAGE SEVENTEEN

1/ Cut to a long panel of OSU Campus’ Mirror Lake, as Josh gives a new student a tour of the Campus Area. They walk around the lake, Josh gesturing toward it as he explains its significance to Campus Culture. The boy he’s with is just some random kid. Model him on anyone. It doesn’t matter.

JOSH: …and of course, this is the famous MIRROR LAKE.
JOSH: It’s a pretty big Campus ritual that on the night before the Michigan Game, something like THOUSANDS of students come down here in their underwear or whatever and JUMP IN. It looks like WOODSTOCK down here, when it happens…only WORSE.

2/ Josh turns to the other kid.

JOSH: If you’d started in the FALL, you’d have already seen it.
JOSH: But it’s okay, it’s a YEARLY thing. You’re going to see it SOONER or LATER.

3/ On the other kid, over Josh’s shoulder.

KID: And everyone just…jumps in?

JOSH: Yeah. Like a bazillion of your fellow students, all covered in mud in their underwear. It’s pretty wild. You’ll have to check it out next year.

4/ The two walk past the lake, approaching the Mirror Lake café on the hill nearby. Josh sticks his hands into his pockets as he walks, the new guy asking uncomfortable questions of him.

KID: So, hey, is it true that you got to hang with the KNIGHTS OF COLUMBUS once? Like…the superhero thing, not the CATHOLIC thing.

5/ Josh glances up at him awkwardly.

JOSH: I’d really rather not TALK about it, if you don’t MIND.
JOSH: A lot of REALLY BAD STUFF had to happen to CREATE that situation, so please don’t take offense if I’d prefer to change the subject…

6/ They arrive at the door to the café, and Josh reaches out to open it.

KID: Oh, no. Hey, man – I didn’t mean to cross a LINE or anything. I’m sorry.

JOSH: No, it’s cool. You didn’t know. Let’s get something to eat.

PAGE EIGHTEEN

1/ This is a Full Page Splash. The door to the Mirror Lake Café bursts open, revealing a whole new Army of Zombies, lashing out at Josh and the New Kid. This is the best look we really get at the Zombies, in all their decomposing gruesomeness. Josh leaps into a defensive stance, while the new kid looks hopelessly terrified.

JOSH: Run, dude!
JOSH: RUN!!!

ZOMBIES (in many little tailless balloons): ugh argggh yarggg graaaaa muhhh hunnnhh

PAGE NINETEEN

1/ Cut to a Long panel, close on Donovan and Rhiannon’s running-shoe clad feet, padding up the road with the sights and sounds of Campus-area High Street in the BG. Rhiannon misses a step in surprise, and calls out to Donovan.

RHI: Donovan, stop!

2/ Over Rhiannon’s shoulder as Don turns to face her, confused.

DON: Rhi, what’s wrong?

RHI: Don’t you HEAR that?

3/ Rhiannon’s eyes are wide with fear as she waits to hear more.

RHI: It’s coming from CAMPUS!
RHI: Donovan, I think it’s people SCREAMING!

4/ Suddenly, Rhiannon is knocked to her feet by a crumbling, decomposing Zombie, racing out into the street from the grassy lawns of campus. He claws at her, and she trips, falling to the sidewalk as Donovan looks on in shock.
ZOMBIE: muhhh! Hunnnhh!

RHI: What the hell?!

DON: Oh God!

5/ Rhiannon tries to get back to her feet, but the Zombie is on top of her, holding her down to the ground and spitting saliva and blood into her helpless face. She screams in terror, shielding her face as best she can with her forearms.

ZOMBIE: Yarrrgg! YARRRGGH!

RHI: OH MY GOD JESUS CHRIST DONOVAN!
RHI: DONOVAN, HELP!!!

6/ The Zombie is rocked backward as a jogging-shoe encased foot strikes it in the face, sending the decomposing head flying out of panel and into the distance. The headless body grasps pointlessly in the air, blood spurting from its neck.

SOUND EFFECT: Thunk!!

7/ Low angle shot as Rhiannon looks up at Donovan, standing over her with his hand extended to help her to her feet. The blue glow and curling steam that indicate Donovan’s effort to control the demon inside him shine brightly from his eyes against the backdrop of the mid-afternoon sun.

DON: Looks like our VACATION just got cut SHORT.

PAGE TWENTY

1/ Back to Campus, where Andrew is knee-deep in attempting to fight the Zombies alone. He swirls around, swinging a baseball bat he found somewhere in all directions, and connects with the nearest Zombie, sending its head flying out of panel.

SOUND EFFECT: THOK!

ANDREW: NNGHH!

2/ Behind Andrew, who has his back to us, we can see a Zombie attempting to sneak up from his blind spot, reaching out to catch Andrew in its clutches.

ZOMBIE: Hrrrmmm! HRRMMMM!!

3/ Andrew moves just in time, as the Zombie sneaking up behind him is hit with a violent blue energy blast, sending it flying off into the distance. Andrew realizes his arm hair is singed by his closeness to the blast, and his face registers the horror of the close call.
SOUND EFFECT: CHOOM!

ANDREW: WHOA!

4/ Andrew turns, and we see a Large Panel of Rhiannon and Donovan, come to the rescue and posing dramatically like comic book superheroes. Rhiannon’s hands are still smoking from the blast of kinetic energy she just fired at the Zombie, and Donovan’s hands are stained with blood from killing other Zombies. His eyes leak blue smoke.

RHI: Hey, Andrew.
RHI: Little HELP?

ANDREW: That would be GREAT, actually.

5/ Close on Donovan, as his face contorts with the effort of letting Ozymandias out in a controllable way. The blue glow in his eyes slowly begins to shift, to the orange of molten lava associated with demon power.

DON: Alright, Ozzy.
DON: Do your THING.

6/ Even Closer, on Donovan’s eyes, as they finally turn BRIGHT orange.

DON/OZZY: (monster balloon) That’s more LIKE it.

7/ Donovan/Oz spins around, his newly bulging muscles flexing, as his forearm strikes a Zombie in the face and severs its head from its body, blood flying in all directions.

SOUND EFFECT: THUK!

PAGE TWENTY-ONE

1/ Back to Josh, running through the chaos that has ensued on Campus. People are running everywhere, terrified and screaming, and blood stains the grass for as far as the eye can see – both human and Zombie.

2/ Close up as Josh’s foot catches a rock that sticks up from the mud, and he trips.

SOUND EFFECT: Thunk!

JOSH: (off panel) OW!

3/ Josh flies to the ground, face forward, and his chin strikes the mud in front of a large tree. A tooth flies from his mouth, bouncing off the ground in front of him. Blood squirts.

SOUND EFFECT: CRACKK!
4/ Josh spins around, struggling to crawl backward up against a tree, staring in horror at the Zombies that now descend on his helpless form. Blood runs down his lower jaw from his broken tooth.

JOSH: No, please…
JOSH: Please, GOD!

5/ He crosses his arms, holding them in front of his face as useless protection, and closes his eyes tightly to shut out the image of the hungry man-eating monsters, now off-panel.

JOSH: God, save me. PLEASE!

6/ Suddenly, the image of Josh protecting himself is lit with a bright orange glow, and he pops open one eye to see what is happening.

JOSH: What’s…?

7/ The Zombies that were once chasing Josh are now engulfed in a sea of flame, writhing about wildly as they stumble into each other. Josh scrambles up a bit toward the tree, and we see the horrible tableaux of burning Zombie over his shoulder.

JOSH: God? Did I actually…?

8/ From the sea of flame, we see the silhouetted form of Milo appear, slowly taking shape as he walks through the flame toward Josh.

MILO: I may not be GOD, exactly…
MILO: But I just might be the NEXT BEST THING.

9/ Milo appears in full view, realizing for the first time who he’s talking to. He immediately drops the cutesy act and crouches before Josh, making sure he’s okay.

MILO: JOSH!?
MILO: Are you OKAY!?

JOSH: MILO! Oh, my God, thank you.

10/ Long panel as Josh gets to his feet, dusting himself off and inspecting his tooth. Milo glances around, surveying the insanity all over Campus.

MILO: Are you like, a MAGNET for this crap or something?

JOSH: Am I ever. But thank god for YOU, or I would’ve been dog meat.

MILO: Thank my co-worker, Rick. I left him ALONE for this.

JOSH: So, what now?

MILO: Now?
MILO: We start KILLING ZOMBIES.

PAGE TWENTY-TWO

1/ Cut to Tina Eakin, the reporter we’ve seen in previous issues, standing amidst the violence on Campus and speaking into her microphone as the camera crew records everything. She looks frazzled but resilient, doing her best to keep it together.

TINA: This is Tina Eakin, reporting live for 10-TV news.
TINA: I’m here at OSU Campus, where it’s an ABSOLUTE MADHOUSE right now. Nobody’s sure what –

2/ From behind, Tina is assaulted by a Zombie, who shoves her and sends her tumbling forward, striking her head off the camera and nearly toppling the camera man, as well. Blood explodes from her forehead at the point of impact, and she tries to spin to fend off the Zombie.

TINA: Ahhh!

3/ Tina looks up from where she’s fallen on the ground, and her camera crew stands behind her, looking around in fear. They are completely surrounded by Zombies, closing in from all directions. Tina crawls on all fours, looking for protection anywhere.

TINA: Oh, dear Lord.
TINA: I’m going to DIE!

4/ Tina does as Josh did, shielding her view with her hand as she meets death – but instead of being eaten, she is abruptly lost in the giant shadow cast by a new arrival…a shadow that depicts a large wolf-shaped beast tossing Zombies to and fro.

5/ Large panel as Beth and Landon jump into the fray in werewolf form, putting themselves between the Zombies and the news crew, roaring defiantly in the direction of the Zombies.

BETH: RARRR!

LANDON: GRRRAAHHH!

PAGE TWENTY-THREE

1/ BethWolf turns to face Tina, growling commands at her as benevolently as possible.

BETH: Tina, I recommend you RUN. As far away as you CAN!
2/ Tina recoils from BethWolf in terror, still shielding herself.

TINA: You’re – You’re –

BETH (off panel) SAVING YOUR ASS!
BETH: NOW GO!

3/ The camera crew scatters, led by Tina, as they escape death. In the BG, Beth and Landon leap headlong into a pile of writhing Zombies, tossing carcasses left and right.

4/ Landon slashes through a Zombie, spilling its rotten innards to the ground.

5/ Beth tears a Zombie in half, down the middle, splattering blood all around, roaring to the sky as she does.

6/ The two werewolves crouch in the middle of their bloodbath, conferring quickly as they exchange nervous glances.

BETH: Landon, you do REALIZE what this must MEAN, right?

LANDON: Trying REALLY HARD not to THINK about it, Beth!

PAGE TWENTY-FOUR

1/ Milo fires a blast of flame into the crowd of Zombies, Josh hiding behind him.

SOUND EFFECT: FOOSH!

2/ Donovan and Rhiannon stand amidst another crowd of Zombies, Rhiannon firing energy blasts and Donovan swinging his fist around, ripping into chest cavities like paper bags. Blood flies all around him as Rhiannon’s blasts light them in blue.

SOUND EFFECT: CHOOM! CHOOM!

SOUND EFFECT: Splatt! Slassh!

3/ Landon and Beth continue to tear through the crowd, ripping and shredding as they go.

LANDON: Raarr!

SOUND EFFECT: Schriippp!

4/ Andrew swings his baseball bat, knocking the head off of another Zombie. He has clearly been at this for a while, and he is dripping with blood and sweat.

SOUND EFFECT: Thok!
5/ The group stands finally in one LARGE PANEL, surveying the scene around them. Zombie bodies lie everywhere, and they are all six splattered in blood. Andrew and Milo stand in the center, Andrew’s bat hanging loosely at his side, and Milo’s hands smoldering with spent flame. Crouched on either side are Donovan and Rhiannon, both catching their breath as they look around for the next target. In the BG loom the werewolves, baring their teeth at anything and everything.

ANDREW: Is that ALL of them?

MILO: If it IS, we are officially the biggest BADASSES ever.

6/ Close on BethWolf.

BETH: I think we got them all, but there may be a few stragglers. They spread pretty quickly once they’re in a crowd.

7/ Close on Rhiannon.

RHI: If there are, we should spread out.
RHI: Make sure we take care of any that may have gotten away.

PAGE TWENTY-FIVE

1/ Andrew turns over his shoulder, eyeing LandonWolf for the first time. He drops his bat, and raises his eyebrow in burgeoning anger.

ANDREW: Landon….

LANDON: Andrew, WAIT.

2/ Close on Landon.

LANDON: Before you say it, MacTiernan, I ALREADY know what you’re thinking.

3/ Rhiannon looks confused.

RHI: Wait, what’s he thinking?

4/ Andrew walks slowly toward Landon, never breaking eye-contact. He isn’t even remotely scared of the werewolf he’s giving threatening looks.

ANDREW: I’m thinking that if there are ZOMBIES here, then the goddamn BROTHERHOOD can’t be too far BEHIND.

5/ Beth and Landon pull back a bit, getting defensive.

NARR (BETH): So, remember what I was saying earlier, about the things you put off dealing with until it’s too late?

BETH: Andrew…

LANDON: I have NO IDEA if this was a BROTHERHOOD approved ACTION.
LANDON: Give me some time to make some PHONE CALLS.

6/ On Donovan, Rhiannon, and Milo, as Donovan steps forward. He’s now completely under control, his eyes fading out from the blue glow to their normal color. Behind him, Rhiannon and Milo look confused.

DON: This is not the first mention of this BROTHERHOOD that I’ve heard.
DON: Please ENLIGHTEN me.

MILO: Yeah. What he said.

7/ Beth and Landon have now transformed back to human form, and are climbing up from the mud in their underwear, steam rising from their bodies.

BETH: It’s the VLADIC BROTHERHOOD.

LANDON: And it’s SUPPOSED to be a SECRET.

NARR: And how we push them away because we figure it’ll be okay for a while, and then it blows up in your face?

8/ Donovan looks pissed, recoiling in disbelief, as Milo leans forward menacingly.

DON: A SECRET!?

MILO: Yeah, well, the secret’s OUT, Adams Family.
MILO: It’s out in big, bloody PUDDLES all over CAMPUS.
MILO: So how’s about you fill in the BLANKS for us, eh?

9/ Close on Andrew, furious.

ANDREW: Yeah, Landon.
ANDREW: FILL IN THE BLANKS.

NARR: Well…this is one of those things.

PAGE TWENTY-SIX

1/ Cut to a dimly lit bar, on the Short North. Sitting at the bar is David, along with a nameless friend of his with whom he is sharing a drink.

CAPTION: Later. The Short North.

DAVID: So, yeah. His name is MILO.
DAVID: He seems like a sweet guy.

FRIEND: I’m so happy you’ve got a DATE! I mean, how LONG has it been?

2/ On the friend, gesturing toward David.

DAVID (off panel): Too long, man. Too long.

FRIEND: Well, whatever.
FRIEND: It’s not like you aren’t gonna find some way to screw this up sooner or lat –

OFF-PANEL: AHHH!

3/ Long panel as a random girl gets up from her bar table, being attacked by a stray Zombie that escaped Campus and made its way down High Street. The Zombie sinks its rotten teeth into her shoulder, sending blood gushing everywhere.

GIRL: AHHH!
GIRL: SOMEBODY, HELP!!!!

4/ On David and his friend, as they shrink back in horror.

DAVID: Holy crap!!

FRIEND: What the hell, man!?

5/ Close on David, a look of steely determination on his face.

DAVID: Hold on.
DAVID: I’ve got this.

6/ David gets up from his barstool, and his friend reaches out to stop him. David holds his hands out beseechingly, promising his friend he’ll be just fine.

FRIEND: David, what are you DOING?!

DAVID: I said I’m taking care of it. Relax.

7/ On the friend, watching in surprise as something happens off panel. A green light flashes, illuminating the entire bar. The friend shields his eyes from the blinding light.

FRIEND: ::gasp!::

PAGE TWENTY-SEVEN

1/ This is a FULL PAGE SPLASH, as David is revealed standing in the middle of the bar, amidst a cloud of green smoke. The Zombie is gone, and the girl who was attacked huddles in the BG in fear, quivering. The green smoke emanates from David’s hands, which still glow slightly green from the energy discharge he made in destroying the Zombie.

DAVID: See?
DAVID: I TOLD you.




CAPTION: Next – THE BROTHERHOOD!